Cheeseburgers in Paradise


To those of you who have been adulting for more than seven minutes...
When someone shows their appreciation for a kind act or job well done,
are you more or less likely to repeat your appreciated behavior?

⏹ I would be more inclined to repeat behavior, knowing my efforts are being
recognized and appreciated. 
⏹ Another person's appreciation of my work or activities has no bearing
on my performance level. 

Regardless of your own response, being in a healthy relationship means knowing how your partner would answer this question.
If you're a person who requires frequent affirmations, and your partner has never once thanked you for sending his mother a birthday card
Without feeling appreciated, over time you may start to feel taken for granted, angry, even resentful. It's more than about the birthday cards, isn't it?

Here's where it gets personal. 

Our family has been undergoing major changes over the past year, the majority of which are confidential until they're not.
If you're close to us, you know what's up.
To say we have a few pans in the fire is fairly appropriate.
Everyone has their own stuff, and years of COVID has created depression and anxiety in previously healthy individuals. Humans require interacting with others. Isolation can be brutal; there's a reason solitary confinement is a punishment for convicted criminals. 


Today the hubby and I were discussing life, as it were, recalibrating our pages,
prioritizing fires, and an argument ensued.
Really, what's the likelihood of someone raising their voice, being stubborn or reacting emotionally disproportionately in a home where 86% of the residents have some form of PTSD (jury is still out on the service dog)?

But hey.
It bonds us. 
We get each other.
We're honest about our crap.
We help each other. 
We love each other.

Somewhere amidst this intense discussion with the hubby, I received his intended message.
He was feeling unappreciated for his contributions to our home.

My response was an encouraging, "welcome to my world."

Obviously not my proudest wife moment.

The truth is, my husband does more than he physically and emotionally is capable of on a daily basis to care for our family. 

I know with certainty I am not the only one in our home who appreciates him.
I'm here to tell my husband, in this public forum, how truly appreciated he is. 

Babe, you're seriously my rock. I couldn't manage this circus without you.
I wouldn't want to. I appreciate you so much. 

I really wish I could give you the gift of an orthopedic referral from the VA,
but I might have my sights set too high.
So instead of, or until that happens, I will just thank you from the bottom of my heart
for everything you do for our family.
I love you infinitely and appreciate your guts out. (In this house, that's actually a thing...)

Thank you for carrying the load when I can't, and sharing it when I can. 

#herniateddisc #communitycare #missionactION #wearefamily #endthestigma #angusburgermeanslove

LOVE cheeseburger, inspired by the chef of all burger creations - my husband

Shot Through the Heart cheeseburger, inspired by Bon Jovi

Don't Worry Be Happy cheeseburger, inspired by Bobby McFerrin

This Kiss cheeseburger, inspired by Faith Hill

El Fuego, inspired by the idea we had s'mores supplies on-hand.
S'mores bummer.
Great fire though.

Future Jesus Warriors, inspiration from God


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